Faire Thee Well

Spent the day the other weekend with my friends at the Bristol Renaissance Faire right over the border in Wisconsin.  Nothing says medieval Europe to me like 20 acres of Hollywood sets on steroids, off a Wisconsin expressway frontage road!
The most significant feature of the Renaissance Faire has to be the people!  There is a large contingent of actors who ply the Faire grounds, from street urchins, loafers and performers, giving the place the trademark charm and atmosphere of a Renaissance village.  There are processions of nobles, guards marching, and vendors hawking their wares, and stages with musicians, jousting, falconers and comedy acts around every corner.
Not surprisingly, there also is a vast array of people who come already dressed in costume.  And by vast, I mean not only in quantity, but in girth as well.  There were no malnourished peasants in this medieval village.  To be fair, as I strolled the grounds, I did realize that there was a great deal of detail and effort that people put into their costumes.  There were bands of warriors, dressed in armor and furs, with two-handed swords strapped across their backs, and flagons dangling from their belts. Women were dressed in everything from high-necked dresses to fairies in wings and sheer fabrics.
As I visited the various clothing shops, I realized that if I would ever consider going medieval, it would take quite an outlay of cash to look authentic.  One leather vest I tried on was sized like a suit coat, and as I admired my 42 Long in a mirror, I balked at the $395 price tag.  I want to go medieval, not bankrupt!
While you could get creative and make a costume on the cheap (think puffy shirt and pirate garb), I do believe that there is a minimum amount of effort you should put in if you are going to parade around the grounds as if you live there. This was never more evident as one guy who walked past, shirtless, with a sword stuck in his belt, in a pair of black Lycra stretch pants that were so tight you knew what religion he was.  I'm not sure if there were homeless people in medieval times, but if there were, I'm positive they'd look like him.
"Spare shilling for a cup of ale, mate?" 
Speaking of ale, the food and beverages were prolific.  I had to start the day with the ubiquitous turkey leg.  The sad sick thing is that I am not even a big dark meat fan, but I bought and ate that whole goddamn thing!  Sure it cost $8.00, but you get to pick the turkey out of your teeth for the rest of the day!
Beer didn't cost much more than what you would pay at a Chicago bar, and the selection was surprisingly diverse.  This was good thing, because it was a long, hot day and my significant wench of 19 years can put back a flagon or two!  At this rate I'll never afford that vest!  Now, how much again for that broadsword?